Anyone who has been or is currently in a long-distance relationship knows that it’s a hard thing to maintain. Ji-Yeon Lee’s article in “Journal of Counseling Psychology” recorded that 75 percent of college students have been in a long-distance relationship and 35 percent are in one currently. Long-distance relationships can be more frustrating and expensive because finding the time to visit each other requires more planning. However, this does not mean that they are impossible to get through or incapable of staying strong. Any relationship can be successful if handled correctly, including long-distance ones.
For people who are in a long-distance relationship or contemplating starting one, there are some tips that can help make the situation easier to manage. Acknowledge and accept that the relationship will be stressful. This is not, “I’m freaking out about a test” kind of stress, but an emotional rollercoaster type of stress that could potentially be detrimental.. This requires complete honesty with yourself about what you want in a relationship and knowing what you are getting into when choosing who to date, regardless of distance.
“The best piece of advice I can give is that communication is key,” said Lauriane Cayel, a sophomore who was in a long-distance relationship.
If there is no communication between two individuals, there is no relationship. For long-distance relationships this can be a challenge, but with today’s technology, communication can be easier than ever. Skype allows people to talk face-to-face via video chat. Cell phone companies now offer data plans that have unlimited calling and texting so people can remain in contact. The iPhone offers FaceTime, an app that is similar to Skype, but more portable. Email is even a reliable go-to method to keep up communication. Technology certainly makes the distance easier. However, when technology is not available the old-fashioned use of a hand written letter can go a long way. The important thing is for both parties to communicate by whatever means necessary and as much as possible.
In Laura Stafford’s book “Maintaining Long-Distance and Cross-Residential Relationships” she states, “Being open and honest is crucial in any relationship.”
It is extremely crucial that honesty always remains the best policy in any relationship, especially in long distance. When honesty and trust are established, both partners are more comfortable being apart from one another. Honesty is the foundation to most successful relationships.
When you are in a long-distance relationship, you will obviously miss your partner. Find ways to distract yourself. Instead of sitting at home eating ice cream, waiting for your boyfriend or girlfriend to call, go out and do something. Not having your partner there gives you the freedom and time to join clubs or other extra-curricular activities, hang out with friends and try new things. Even though it isn’t a bad thing to put time into relationships, it can potentially hinder us from exploring different things or keep our friendships secure. It’s perfectly healthy to have lives outside of each other.
Finally, find the good in the bad. Make cute and clever ways to communicate with each other. Watch a movie with your partner via Skype, send care packages to each other and tell each other things that happened in the day that remind you of the other. Encourage each other when the distance is more prominent. Be supportive of one another.
The WikiHOW article “How to Make a Long-Distance Relationship Work: 18 Steps” states, “As long as you see the long-distance relationship as a temporary state, you will keep your chin up and transmit that feeling of security and happiness to your partner too.”
Negative comments are often said about long-distance relationships, primarily that they never work out because the physical separation is too much, This is true for some couples, but it’s not physicality that keeps a relationship solid.
It is about the two people involved as well as the time, effort and commitment they put forth. Studies show that long-distance relationships can be just as satisfying as geographically close relationships. Long distance can be miserable and require effort from both ends, but it’s not impossible.
