Historically, societies that have succeeded embodied discipline, valor and self-control. It is important that we cultivate these characteristics in ourselves and in younger generations, especially in men, and remember that masculinity can still be positive and healthy.
On Jan. 15, terrorists associated with Al-Shabaab attacked a business complex in Nairobi, Kenya. Hearing the sound of gunfire, a lone, off-duty SAS member that was shopping in the area took quick and decisive action by grabbing his weapons, body armor and medical supplies out of his vehicle and rushed toward the armed assailants. In an act of complete disregard for personal well-being, this hero engaged several enemy combatants by himself and helped people escape until backup arrived.
This level of valor and altruism is hard to find nowadays. It is crucial that we develop these characteristics of fearlessness and selflessness in ourselves and the younger generations, particularly in boys.
There’s been a lot of buzz around the phrase “toxic masculinity” lately. The American Psychological Association published a report stating that traits such as self-reliance, competitiveness, emotional stoicism and other characteristics that are deemed traditionally masculine are counterproductive to forming relationships between male peers. To an extent this is true. Anything in excess is bound to be destructive. However, in many ways, this is simply how men build each other up.
Unlike women, who generally offer encouragement, men tend to constantly compete with one another. Rather than tender encouragement, you will likely observe that they are probably ragging on each other pretty hard. Understandably, it seems brutal at first glance, but it is important to understand that men thrive on that. In his opinion piece on the subject, retired Navy Seal Jocko Willink states that “competitive spirit drives success.”
Even for characteristics such as aggression that typically have a negative connotation, we must be deliberate in choosing to program that out of our men. Aggression in and of itself is neutral — it is a tool that can be used for commendable or malicious purposes. When developed in a healthy manner, aggression gives young men the means to stick up for others, dominate in the athletic arena and even charge towards the sound of gunfire, as the SAS member did.
Willink suggests in his aforementioned opinion piece that “if you are not aggressive, you will not be able to capitalize on opportunities.” Teaching our young men to be dominant and aggressive is not a skill that only lends itself well in athletic and combat venues, but in the classroom and workplace as well. With the knowledge that he can dominate in any situation that may come his way, a man is inevitably going to be more self-confident and secure in his own abilities.
The world is a harsh and unforgiving place. Letting ourselves and the younger generations become soft and comfortable will inevitably lead to hard times. It is of utmost importance that we as a generation work to prevent this by becoming people of iron-clad resolve, discipline, courage and care for our fellow men.
